


Jessica Jones' Drinking Group for Fuck-Ups

by LarkThePerson



Series: get us in some trouble [1]
Category: Captain America - All Media Types, Daredevil (TV), Jessica Jones (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Bars and Pubs, Bucky Barnes Has Issues, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Bucky Barnes Recovering, Canon-Typical Violence, Clint Barton Has ADHD, Deaf Clint Barton, Depression, Dialogue Heavy, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Implied Childhood Sexual Abuse, Jessica Jones Recovering, Jessica did not sign up for this shit, M/M, Matt Murdock Needs a Hug, Minor Frank Castle/Matt Murdock, POV Jessica Jones, Past Abuse, Past Brainwashing, Past Rape/Non-con, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Recovery, Trauma, they drink so much in this omg
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-06
Updated: 2018-04-05
Packaged: 2018-12-11 19:40:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,959
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11721174
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LarkThePerson/pseuds/LarkThePerson
Summary: “Ok but have you ever shot a bow and arrow?” Clint is asking Bucky and Frank who have been discussing guns and rifles for the last hour.On the other side of the table, Matt and Jessica are shooting the shit about the lawyers they know.This has become Jessica’s thing. Malcolm told her, if she was going to drink she needed to find someone to drink with. So, when Bucky Barnes showed up at her apartment to hire her she invited him out to drink. Now, she has a little group of idiot men who drink with her in a drive bar on odd Tuesdays.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Nico is non-binary and doesn't have any pronouns!
> 
> More detailed warning is in the end notes.

“Hey, look who I found!” Jessica calls as soon as she enters the bar.

Bucky looks up from where he was deep in conversation with someone she doesn’t recognize, to look over at the idiot she’s dragging in. Clint keeps talking for a moment before noticing Bucky’s attention has left him.

He just raises his eyebrows, assessing he guy slowly.

The third guy at the table who she’s only now recognizing as Matt Murdock smiles, “Hello, Frank.” He says and of course they know each other.

Frank huffs out a breath and says to Bucky and Clint, “Frank.”

“I found him in an alley armed to the teeth.” She informs them absentmindedly, looking for a bartender to flag down.

There’s a moment of awkward silence while Bucky reassesses the guy and Matt looks like he’s biting back laugher.

“Bucky.” Bucky introduces himself.

“Are we doing those weird, name only introductions? Like James Bond?” no one answers Clint, and he barrels on, “I’m Clint, Clint Barton.” 

Bucky managed to drag Hawkeye and Daredevil into the bar within two weeks. Jessica feels kind of proud. It takes them a few minutes to acquire alcohol and by the time they’re all settled Clint is already talking too fast and too loud. 

“So, wait? You’re telling me that you parkour around the city fighting crime? And you’re blind.” Clint asks.

“Yeah and he’s damn good at it.” Frank cuts across whatever Matt was going to answer with.

“Woah, hey, no. I’m not attacking your boy. I just- dude that’s so cool. We should go parkouring together sometime.” Clint, it turns out, is a miracle. He says all of that without balking at either Matt or Frank who had both suddenly gone stiff.

Matt relaxes and Frank gives him a strange look.

“Sure. I don’t see why not. You can even come help me beat people up if you want.” He offers.

“I am so down to beat people up. Oh dude-” now he’s addressing Frank, Jessica sits back and matches the long swig of vodka Bucky is taking with her own swig of whiskey. It’s going to be an interesting night.

~~~~~~

“Ok but have you ever shot a bow and arrow?” Clint is asking Bucky and Frank who have been discussing types of guns and rifles for the last hour.

On the other side of the table Matt and Jessica are shooting the shit about the lawyers they know.

This has become Jessica’s thing. Malcolm told her if she was going to drink that she needed to find someone to drink with. So, when Bucky Barnes showed up at her apartment to hire her she invited him out to drink. Now, she has a little group of idiot men who drink with her in a drive bar on odd Tuesdays.

“No.” Frank answers while Bucky scrunches up his whole forehead in concentration.

“I don’t think so?” he says it like a question.

“What the fuck does that mean Barnes?” Jessica shoots from the other side of the table.

“You try answering questions about what you’ve done in the past seventy years with half your brains scooped out.” He shoots back good naturedly.

“You have.” A voice comes from behind Frank. Frank is on his feet in only a moment and everyone else at the table is either stiff as a board or deceptively relaxed.

“How the fuck would you know?” Bucky asks. Both his hands are empty but Frank’s are twitching towards his gun.

“Red room. Soviet Russia. You trained me and then we killed people together. One time we had to improvise.” The woman answers.

“Natalia.” Bucky says looking far away and dazed. Now they’re all waiting to duck. Sometimes flashbacks take Bucky so far away that he breaks tables and fights people who touch him. He’s already broken Matt’s nose and the bar counter.

“I go by Natasha now. Do you mind?” she gestures to the chair. She’s asking Bucky but looking to Frank, who’s looking to Bucky for a command. He nods. Everyone relaxes a little bit.

“Hi Nat!” Clint calls from beside Bucky.

“So, are you also a member of the previously-mind-controlled-by-assholes party?” Jessica asks.

“It would seem so.” Natasha answers as she sits down. 

“Yes!” Clint cheers and high fives Jessica. Then he winces when his arm snaps back a little too hard.

~~~~~~

“And- and I broke his arms. So, he couldn’t touch her anymore. Should have broken all his fingers too, maybe his skull.” Matt’s pretty drunk, and telling them about his first time being a vigilante. Natasha isn’t there that night. She only comes once in a blue moon.

“You should have fucking killed him.” Frank snarls but it’s an argument that’s worn smooth by practice.

“Hey, I killed my rapist. Felt fucking good too.” Jessica cuts in bitterly.

“I wish- not that guy, but some nights I think about it. I’ve had had dreams about cutting off his hands.” Matt trails off but that’s enough.

“Fucking- what you too Murdock?” she asks.

“Not Killgrave, but someone. ‘S ok. Was a long time ago. I didn’t really understand-” He tells her, and she hears Bucky whisper to Frank asking who Killgrave is.

Frank who is apparently so enraged he can’t properly answer. Bucky scooches his chair closer to Clint and then asks him instead.

“I can kill him for you.” She tells him and it’s a little too true. It feels vulnerable to say.

“Matt.” Frank cuts in. Every part of him is tense and she’s amazed he can achieve that kind of stillness. Must be a military thing. She’s seen Matt and Bucky do it too.

Matt’s head looks loose on his body and he tilts it too far to the side when he faces Frank. He looks like he’s spilling.

“Yeah Frank.” He says it like he’s answering a question.

“I’m gonna fucking kill him.” Frank tells him.

“It’s fi-”

“Shut the fuck up Matt,” Bucky tells him helpfully. He and Frank are exchanging significant looks.

“To dead rapists.” Clint raises his beer.

They toast to it.

~~~~~~

They somehow end up at their dive on Saturday. Natasha is even there. They decide early in the evening to try and out hustle each other.

Clint is shit at it, his poker face is crap, but he gets in a fierce competition of darts with some bikers. And then he gets in an even more fierce competition with Matt and Frank and Bucky.

Bucky, it turns out can out dart them all but it’s a close thing.

Matt, is somehow amazing at pool as long as someone is telling him which ball is which. He’s also a natural at hustling people. Natasha is better still. Although everyone in the bar figures out pretty quick that they’re hustling. Then Bucky comes over to play and Jessica is sitting on the sidelines admiring them all.

Bucky, for all he’s a walking disaster, is incredibly graceful. The way he bends and moves is appealing and Jessica is impressed with how confident he looks. It’s a nice look especially because under it all he looks alive and intent, instead of blank and dead the way he often did when they first met.

Matt, she re-realizes, is cute. He’s got a lovely smile and a contagious laugh. The way he moves his fingers and taps his stick is endearing. For all he’s a stubborn asshole, she actually likes him.

Then there’s Natasha. She’s hardly ever with them and when she is she gives away little. But she has a wicked sense of humor and sometimes she tells jokes in Russian until Bucky is howling with laughter. And somehow, she fits right into that soldier culture that Bucky, Frank, and Matt can’t seem to shake. And Clint clearly adores her. She’s just as graceful and lovely as Bucky is.

And Frank. He’s played a few rounds of pool, but now he’s just watching Natasha, Bucky, and Matt move around the table as other people come and go. He’s almost acting like a body guard. It would grate on her if he hadn’t been doing it from the moment she met him. She had just finished kicking some mob asshole into the metal surface of a garbage bin when he jumped down behind her.

“Looks like you have this under control.” He’d said checking the rest of the alley like she couldn’t take care of herself.

“What do you want Punisher?”

“You finished with him?” he asked her weapon at his side.

“Yes”

“Good.” He answered and shot the poor bastard point blank.

“Fucking great. Now they’re going drag me in tomorrow for suspicion of murder.” She spat at him.

“I know a guy.” He told her. 

“Yeah me too. Still doesn’t make it any less fun.”

“You can tell them it was me.” He offered.

“Because that will help so much.” But now that he mentioned it she might just do that.

“Hey you want to get a drink?”

Yeah, Frank is ok. And he has a weird understanding with Bucky. Bucky acts as his CO in a bizarrely smooth transition. She sometimes wonders if they do missions together. And then there is his thing with Matt.

“Do you think they’re fucking?” She asks Clint who is snarking with Natasha in sign language while Matt lines up his shot. Frank is looking at Matt’s ass.

“What?” he’s thrown.

“Frank and Matt. Do you think they’re fucking?” she asks enjoying the way Matt jerks and almost miss-shoots.

“Huh.” He says considering watching them as Matt makes the shot, perfect as usual, and Frank continues to look.

“Let’s ask Natasha. She knows everything.” He says and proceeds to have a quick conversation with her. By the end of it he’s almost in tears with laughter.

“What? What is she saying?” Jessica has to know.

He’s doubled over with laughter and it takes him a moment to sit up and speak. When he does he signs along with his words. 

“They’re totally fucking.” He manages to get out before dissolving into giggles again.

She looks over to Matt who is turning red into his hairline and Bucky beside him who is trying to hold in his laughter. Natasha looks like the cat who got the canary. Everyone else at the pool table is bewildered.

Jessica flags Frank down.

“Is that why you call him Red?” she asks.

“What?” 

“The blush. Is that why you call him Red?” 

His grin is wolfish.

“Watch this.” He tells her. And then walks over to Matt and grabs hold of his face and gives him a gentle but thorough kiss. Clint starts wolf-whistling and then Jessica cheers and soon the whole bar is cheering them. By the time they’re done Matt is red all the way down to his shirt collar and the tips of his ears and Frank looks supremely pleased if not a little pink. 

Natasha hands Bucky a fifty. 

~~~~~~

“What the fuck Matt?”

Somehow Jessica’s other lawyer is in their shitty little bar on a Wednesday at one in the morning.

“Uhh, hey Fog.” Matt says.

Foggy grabs his shoulder. Bucky is tense beside Matt. He clearly hasn’t decided if Foggy is allowed to be here yet.

“What the fuck are you doing drinking with Jessica Jones, Hawkeye, and the fucking Punisher, Matt?” he hisses like the whole table can’t hear him.

Matt stands abruptly, grabs the front of Foggy’s shirt, drags him out of the door.

“Should we y’know- check on them?” Clint asks no one in particular.

“If they’re not back in 10 minutes, I’m going out there.” Bucky tells the table. Jessica’s not sure what’s crawled up his ass but looking at how tense Frank is beside him maybe she does.

Jessica thinks they’re all hilarious. Foggy is one of the softest people she knows. 

When the ten minutes are up and Bucky is moving towards the door, the owner, a kid named Nico that Jessica had found through Malcolm, calls “Yo, I know it’s early for y’all but I’ve got a thing tomorrow so I’m gonna close up early if y’all don’t mind.”

They all file out behind Bucky, calling goodnights to Nico.

When they get to the street, they find Foggy staring murderously at Matt who is staying resolutely silent.

“This is not over Matt.” Foggy tells him.

“Foggy,” Matt’s sounds exhausted. Matt doesn’t tell them a lot about Foggy but they all know it’s a painful topic for him. 

“C’on Matt, go home.” Bucky says in a soft tone.

“Excuse me, we’re talking about something here. Who the fuck are you-” Foggy starts and Jessica winces internally. For all that Foggy is a great lawyer he’s an idiot when he’s angry, and drunk. This is going to go so badly.

“Hello, Franklin Nelson, employee of Hogarth, Chao and Benowitz, son of-” Bucky starts in a totally flat tone that is deeply threatening. Because of course Bucky is going posture like a hyper-masculine asshole in front of a lawyer who couldn’t punch his way out of paper bag. Foggy looks genuinely terrified.

“Ok, no. You know what we are not doing this right now.” Jessica says, as Bucky keeps listing facts and staring Foggy down. Jessica can see the color draining out of Foggy’s face. Foggy has no idea what he stepped into.

She shoves Bucky gently. It’s a risky move. He’s not always ok with people touching him.

He seems to snap out of it.

“Take Clint home.” She tells him. He looks over her shoulder to see Clint leaning against the door of the bar which Nico is trying to open it behind him. He looks at Matt who’s leaning into Frank, who’s glaring daggers at Foggy, and then at Jessica.

“We can accost Foggy later,” Foggy’s face gets, if possible, even paler than before “when it’s not one AM and when we’re not all drunk.” She tells him. She kind of hates that she’s the voice of reason.

“I’m not drunk.” He tells her.

“Yeah but the rest of us are.” She grits out, completely exasperated. Why does she bother invite these assholes out drinking?

“Fine.” He moves off the collect Clint.

“Thanks Jess.” Foggy says sounding relieved. Frank and Matt are walking away in the wake of Bucky and Clint. Nico slams the door beside them. Right, he has that weird lock. Frank keeps promising to fix it.

“Get out of here Foggy.” 

~~~~~~

Captain fucking America walks through the door, eventually.

Bucky’s nowhere in sight because Matt somehow knows what Captain America’s heart beat sounds like and warned them that he was incoming. Bucky still doesn’t want to be found by him. So, he hides.

As he walks, in Nico starts choking. Matt calls across the room, “Nico, you need to breathe!” 

Matt then gets up, walks right up to Captain America, and shakes his hand. “Captain.”

“Matt.” 

At this point the whole bar is staring. Which is luckily only Jessica’s little group and two other patrons. 

“What brings you to this neck of the woods?” Matt asks, as he brings Captain America over to their table.

“I’m actually here to pick up Clint. Natasha said he’d be here.” Something rings strange about that. Jessica has seen Clint drunkenly run out on their evenings because Natasha or Captain America or even Iron Man called him. They’ve never come to pick him up personally.

“Aww Cap. No. C’on, take a seat. Get a drink.” Clint tells him. And he must know the Captain is lying through his teeth. She wonders if he was hoping to see Bucky. If he knows.

“You know I can’t get drunk.” He tells Clint.

“Oh, shut up. I know you keep beer in fridge.” Clint tells him happily.

“It’s for Sam.” He says but sits down anyway. And turns to Frank.

“Hi, I’m Steve.” And isn’t he just made of sunshine and apple pie.

“Frank.” And Frank does that weird military thing she sees him do around other vets. He sits differently. His expressions are different. 

“Jessica.” She tells him when he looks at her, “and you’re Captain fucking America.”

“Guilty as charged.” He says before turning towards Nico to order.

“So, Frank where did you serve?” he asks and then they’re off.

 

Steve seems to be slightly uncomfortable around Frank for all that they bonded over being vets. Probably because he unrepentantly shoots bad people in the face Jessica thinks. But Frank seems equally uncomfortable around Steve. Jessica doesn’t think too hard about that one.

Clint and Steve seem to know each other well. He even calls Steve his depression bro at some point, which makes Steve balk and makes Matt and Jessica crack up.

“Wait, Matt!” Clint shouts as Matt is laughing.

“Hmm,” he cocks his head towards Clint.

“You’re a depression bro too! Dude, you should come over for our movie and pizza nights.” Clint tells him in a rush.

“Sure.” Matt says casually but Jessica can tell he’s not convinced.

“Oh, come on Matt. Live a little.” She says slapping him on the shoulder. Really, she’s just grateful Clint isn’t inviting her.

Matt turns to Steve.

“Steve?” he asks. 

“Jarvis can do audio descriptions.” He offers.

“No, I can do audio descriptions and you can repeat all the lines I miss and we’ll annoy the hell out of Steve!” 

“Sounds great.” Matt says looking inordinately pleased. 

~~~~~~

They finally have a bar fight. Except it’s not really a bar fight.

Nico runs a quiet show. The bar is out of the way and off the radar. It’s not advertised heavily and most people know of it by word of mouth. Once Nico and Natasha met it became even more under the radar. Its a place for ex-cons, vigilantes, and various assorted street people and queer people to come and be anonymous. 

Bucky hadn’t wanted to keep coming to the same bar. He’d wanted to change bars every week and make sure than no one would remember their faces. But Matt had talked him out of it, telling him that he needed some normalcy in his life, to see the same faces and the same room every once in a while. Jessica had silently agreed. It was only after Bucky had accosted Nico about safety procedures and who knew about the bar or didn’t know about it that he’d agreed to stay. Jessica thought that Nico might have some low-level powers. Maybe some reality warping or probability manipulation. 

Frank had gone through the same freak out that Bucky had. Wanting to go to different bars. Needing Nico to tell him all about the patrons before he would agree to keep coming to the same place.

So far, they have been lucky. They are all hunted people in their own ways. Daredevil has Hand and Fisk coming for him. Matt has mobsters and all number of angry business people out to get him. Frank was probably on the terrorist watch list. Actually, he was probably on every terrorist watch list. Not to mention all the loved ones and business associates of all the people he’d killed. And Bucky was also on every terrorist watchlist in existence. In addition to being hunted by Hydra and any number of other nefarious groups who want the Winter Soldier to be their toy. 

And Clint gets into all kinds of trouble with no help at all. And that doesn’t even take into account the trouble he gets into as Hawkeye.

And Jessica- well she pisses people off. Constantly. It’s bound to catch up with her someday.

So, all together they have more people out to get them than any one of them really wanted to think about.

It was a miracle that they hadn’t been attacked earlier.

Matt, Clint, and Jessica exchang stories about the most absurd injuries they have ever gotten while Bucky listens with intense interest. He tells them that he needs to know more about normal people injuries and recovery time. 

Frank is just listening with amusement. 

It is in the middle of this that Matt interrupts Clint’s story of breaking three toes while alone in his apartment on a normal morning to tell them that there is a group of people coming towards the bar. It wasn’t unusual of for a small group to come in on Tuesday but something about the way Matt says it gives them pause. 

“They’re being too quiet and there’s something about the way their moving.” He frowns. He can’t always articulate what it is that tips him off to danger.

“I don’t think it’s a friendly visit. They’re all in combat boots.” He tells the table.

“Hey Nico!” Frank calls, “we’ve got danger incoming.”

Nico jumps up and starts hustling people out through the back. Bucky gets up and pulls a duffle out from behind the counter. Frank gives him an appreciative look.

“I wanted to be prepared.” He says and opens it to more guns Jessica thinks she’s ever seen at once.

“Shit. I don’t have any weapons.” Clint laments.

“Shut up.” Frank tells him and tosses him a knife. Then Bucky hands him a handgun. 

“How many and how far?” Bucky asks.

“Two blocks still and ten.” Matt says.

“Then we should get to the roof. Matt, Clint, Jessica you ok to say down in the alley? Prevent them from entering the bar.” Bucky’s not really asking, “Frank and I will take the roof.”

“Sure, why not.” Jessica says. 

Matt just nods curtly and Clint hands the knife and gun back.

“I haven’t done any good hand to hand recently. Might be getting rusty.” He tells them.

Frank and Bucky go to the roof to presumably set up with sniper rifles. 

“Let’s find out what these assholes want.” Jessica says as they wait.

The plan is simple. Frank and Bucky on different roofs, watching for more incoming assholes, making sure they didn’t get overwhelmed. The rest of them getting information out of the incoming assholes and beating them senseless so they can call Natasha to come and work her clean up magic. Or her interrogation magic. Whichever they need.

In the end, they take the assholes out in short order. Clint isn’t rusty at all. Neither Frank or Bucky have to shoot anyone and Captain America shows up five minutes late to collect the trash, which turns out to be Hydra in nature.

Captain and his crew had been cleaning out a cell on the outskirts of the city when someone copped to a small-scale raid in the city. They came as quickly as they could. Only to find everyone already unconscious. Unmarked vans follow close behind to take away the unconscious assholes.

This is also the first time she meets Sam, who stands next to Natasha looking supremely amused by the proceedings. 

~~~~~~

“Bucky come on!”

Clint, Jessica, and Bucky have been arguing on Matt’s roof for thirty minutes now. Bucky wants to lay low and stay safe in the wake of Hydra’s little attack. Natasha told Bucky a week ago that they hadn’t known he was there. Hydra had gotten wind of a group of powered people hanging around in a bar and decided to hedge their bets. 

Bucky wants to stop having their drinking nights completely.

Jessica insists that even if he’s laying low they should still have their drinking nights.

Clint agrees.

Matt’s just watching in amused sympathy. Frank is standing quietly to the side.

“What if we go to one of my safe houses?” Frank asks.

Clint had already proposed going to one of Bucky’s safe houses which Bucky opposed vehemently. Matt can’t blame him. Bucky is fiercely protective of his location at all time except for when he’s drinking with them. It is a small miracle that he is even willing to spend time with them at a regularly scheduled time and location. 

“Do you have alcohol?” Jessica asks suspiciously. Of all of them Frank drinks the least.

“We can buy some.” He tells her, unmoved by her scrutiny.

“That sound ok, Bucky?” Matt asks him.

There’s a long silence as Bucky thinks.

“Fine.” He says eventually and then mutters to himself “Fucking idiots.”

Matt gives him a sunshine smile. Bucky sneers halfheartedly at him even knowing he can’t see it.

~~~~~~

They spend three months drinking in Frank’s various safehouses before they go back to Nico’s. When Jessica walks in the door with Bucky the first night back Nico looks on the verge of tears.

“I was worried.” Nico tells them earnestly. 

“That so.” Matt says from behind Jessica causing her to whip around and go to hit him. He dodges. He should know better by now than to startle her.

“Hello, Jessica.” He says brightly.

“Fuck off, Murdock.” She says before stalking off.

Nico smiles at Bucky.

“I missed you.” He says.

Bucky smiles back and Matt laughs.

~~~~~~

It’s a few weeks after that, when Sam Wilson shows up.

Nico starts choking again when he walks in. 

They’re not prepared this time. Matt doesn’t really know Sam and he didn’t warn Natasha, who is actually there that evening, that he was coming.

Bucky starts scrambling when he sees Sam.

Sam calls, “You can hide and I’ll pretend I’ll never saw you and I won’t tell Steve or Tony, or you can stay and I still won’t tell Steve and Tony.” 

“He’s telling the truth.” Matt tells Bucky. 

“He’s a really earnest guy.” Clint tells Bucky.

Frank is doing his weird body guard thing again, standing in front of the table, hand on a holstered gun.

“Stand down.” Bucky tells Frank. Frank clips his gun back in.

Frank still stands there staring Sam down, before Matt swats at him.

“Go apologize to Nico. The kid’s about to have a heart attack.” Matt tells him.

Sure enough, Nico looks on the verge of tears. Nico really loves Falcon.

“Why would you protect me?” Bucky asks and Jessica would feel bad for him if she weren’t already thinking the same thing.

“Look, what you need and what Steve needs are totally different things. If you need to be a ghost and come into a dive bar every few weeks to drink with vigilantes and never see Steve for the rest of your life, I’ll support that. You should be free to make that decision for yourself. I might argue with you or give you suggestions but it’s your life man.” Sam tells him.

Bucky stares at him for a long time.

“Ok.” He finally says. 

“Cool! What are we drinking?” he asks.

Jessica’s drinking straight from a whiskey bottle, Frank, Matt, and Clint are all nursing beers and Bucky’s got a cheap bottle of vodka in hand.

He orders a beer from Nico, who asks for his autograph and a selfie, and then cries a little.

Jessica notices it’s the same kind of beer Steve ordered.

“I don’t know you.” He says to Matt when he sits again.

“I’m Matt Murdock.” He says extending his hand.

“Jessica.” She says from the other side of Sam.

They shake too.

“And the one who almost shot you is Frank.” Natasha tells him.

“I do always like being threatened with guns at 12:30 in the morning in a bar.” Sam says sagely.

Clint cracks up.

~~~~~~

Jessica likes Sam. He’s got a wicked sense of humor and is clearly loyal as hell but unlike every other loyal person she knows he has a head on his shoulders. Or maybe not. He does fly around in a bird suit with Captain America and he’s not even enhanced.

“You are so fucking stupid.” Bucky tells him after Sam tells them about how he got caught up with Steve.

Sam shrugs, “Never claimed to be smart.”

Bucky stares at Natasha with a look a dawning horror. 

“I helped him break into Fort Meade for his wings.” Natasha says in way Jessica takes to mean ‘don’t accuse me of being the sane one.’

“Jesus fucking Christ.” Bucky says. Then turns to Frank.

“What are you only just realizing that everyone you know is insane?” he asks Bucky.

“I just didn’t expect there to be two Steve’s.” Bucky tells him.

“Hey! I take offense to that. I have more self-preservation than him.” Sam argues.

“It’s true.” Natasha tells Bucky looking thoughtful.

“See! Even she agrees with me.” Sam says vindicated.

Bucky just stares incredulously. Then he seems to shake himself a little.

“I’m sorry about your wings.” He says eventually.

“Dude it wasn’t you. I mean yeah it was you, your body did it. But it wasn’t you.” Sam tells him.

Bucky looks unconvinced. Jessica can relate.

“Ok.” He says slowly.

~~~~~~

It’s a few weeks later, when Foggy accosts her in her apartment.

“Jess, what the fuck are you doing?” he’s using his lawyer voice.

“It’s a support group.” She says. She’s barely awake. She slept in yesterday’s jeans so she feels greasy and stiff.

“A support group with Daredevil and the Punisher?” his lawyer voice has broken and now he just sounds incredulous. 

“Nelson what do you want?” she’s too tired for this shit.

“For someone in my life to act like a sane human being.” He snaps.

She rolls her eyes.

“Too bad. This is what you’ve got. Don’t like it? Get new friends.”

Foggy heaves a huge sigh and she leaves to go brush her teeth.

“I’m worried.” He finally admits.

“Don’t be. We take care of our own.” She wonders where that’s coming from right after she says it. Before, she would have said ‘I can take care of myself.’ She tries not to think too hard about it.

“Hey, you want a beer?” she asks.

“Jess, it’s 11 in the morning.” Foggy tells her.

“Is it?” she pops the lip and takes a sip. Then makes a face. Beer and toothpaste taste disgusting together.

He throws up his hands.

“Can you at least tell him I’m worried?” Foggy asks.

“Tell him yourself, moron. Now get out.” She’s so done with him and all the other men in her little group. She needs to talk to Trish or even Natasha. Hell, she’ll even take a conversation with Jerri at this point.

She dials Trish.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, so school is perpetually kicking my ass but here's update anyway. Hope y'all enjoy!
> 
> More detailed warnings at the end.

Clint is a fucking mess. He ends up in dumpsters and getting hit by oncoming traffic almost more than Jessica does. Not to mention the inordinate bar fights and street brawls he gets in. He doesn’t even get in them for good reason. It’s just something that seems to happen to Clint. 

Jessica doesn’t know if she likes him most of the time. He’s definitely her friend but he also annoys the hell out of her.

But still, he’s hilarious. He can get Bucky and Matt to laugh a way only Natasha can top. He sometimes carries the torch of optimism in their little group by himself. 

She knows that without him they would have more dour silences than she could stomach. 

Eventually, she even finds him endearing.

It’s not until she finds Clint and Matt on the roof she was planning to occupy for surveillance, that she really gets it.

They’re both panting hard, grinning like fools, and talking about what they’re going to do for lunch.  
Matt knows she’s there and greets her in the middle of Clint’s rant about the best pizza in New York, making Clint jump.

She just waves and starts setting up shop.

“Dude you have to go, ok.” Clint starts up his rant again as soon as she’s turned away, “Like I know you   
have this whole thing with your senses and you’re broke as shit but it’s so good. I’ll pay ok?” Clint is waving his hands enthusiastically. Matt, she sees, looks charmed.

“Where is it?” Matt asks.

“We can totally parkour down there. There’s this great building if you come in from the south- oh man, you’re gonna love it.” Clint sometimes gets caught up in what he’s saying and tries to jam all of his words into one breath. It used to kind of bug her but seeing Matt laugh with crinkles at the edges of his eyes she finds she doesn’t mind so much. 

“Lead the way.” Matt says, eventually, after he’s considered.

Clint whoops and throws himself gracefully down onto the neighboring building. Matt follows with a happy laugh. She thinks about how carefree they looked together for the rest of the day.

~~~~~~

She calls Clint later that week, because Bucky’s not picking up the phone and Frank doesn’t know where he is and she’s not calling Natasha, so she hazards a guess that Clint will know.

“Hi Jessica! What’s up?” he sounds bright. She doesn’t know how he does it. She knows that some mornings he can’t get himself out of bed. He’s contributed his fair share to the extensive discussions they’ve had at Nico’s about their mental health. Clint talks about his asshole brain, his term not hers, all the time. And somehow, he seems so happy when they’re around each other.

It wears her out.

“Have you seen Bucky?”

“Uhh,” the background noise she hears dims, “He’s probably spying on us right now. Why? You wanna talk to him?” 

Jessica wonders what the hell he’s spying on Clint for.

“Yes, I would.” She’s got some information about his surviving family and their personal history as well as the names of several of his pervious handlers and locations of facilities that used to house the Winter Soldier. 

“Cool, I’ll get him in here. Hey Steve, I’m getting Bucky down here.” She hears some shouted response and wonders if she even wants to know what the hell is going on over there.

It takes a few minutes, and Jessica listens to the Clint’s side of the conversation he’s having with Steve. She doesn’t really take anything in. Just lets the sound wash over her.

“Hey, Bucky,” he says eventually, then the phone crackles.

“Jessica, what?” he demands but he doesn’t sound unfriendly.

“I have some information.”

He refuses to hear what she has to say. She tries her best not to start yelling at him. She’s done so much work for him, and it hasn’t been easy work. She doesn’t really have the resources to research Hydra cells or the locations of his pervious handlers. Normally, she would call up her SHIELD contact to help her but Bucky explicitly told her not to do that. Not that she would normally care, but its Bucky.

Natasha helped her, instead. Actually, Natasha helped her a lot with the Hydra research. She’s pretty sure that Natasha is feeding her some of this information from Captain America. Bucky probably knows that already too. But Jessica gives him a nice little illusion that she’s in control. And somehow, she can’t begrudge him that.

And yet here they are, on the phone, with Bucky saying: “Not right now.”

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean? You told me to get this information asap.” She’s not shouting yet.

“It means not right now.” Bucky’s tone is final, if a little brittle. Jessica doesn’t really care. He doesn’t speak a word as Jessica cusses him out and hangs up. 

~~~~~~

Four days later, someone shows up in her apartment in the middle of the night. They come in on cat feet through a window and when a floor board creaks under their boot she throws an empty bottle, before pinning them to the wall. Cracking the plaster. Again.

The person doesn’t make a sound as she does it, except to exhale. Instead, they grab her by the shoulder. It is when she feels the unnatural stiffness of the fingers she realizes its Bucky. She lets him go and he remains stiff against the wall. 

“Jesus, you fucking asshole.” she has to turn away and go into the kitchen to grab a new bottle of jack to catch her breath as she says. He’s still standing against the wall when she gets back.

She takes a long swig to give him a moment and then asks: “What the fuck?”

“The information.” He gets like that sometimes. Short curt sentences, avoiding eye contact. He doesn’t look too bad yet so she ignores his mood. Instead, she crosses her arms and stares at him. 

He stares her down but his expression isn’t blank. It’s changing slightly as she watches. Finally, he says, “It feels like a cocoon. Not in a bad way but being here,” he waves a hand, “feels slow and-” he shrugs. “I didn’t want it to stop.”

She watches some more, wonders what the hell that is even supposed to mean.

“I’m not your therapist.” She snarks. 

He nods.

“If you’re going to avoid me and the information you asked me to gather for you then fucking tell me. Tell me to fuck off or that you need some time. Don’t be a fucking asshole.”

He nods expression barely changing.

She sighs and walks to her office to grab the file. He doesn’t follow her.

“Here.” She shoves the packet of files at him.

“Thank you,” he says before he turns to leave.

“Hey,” she calls after him as he heads to the door, “If you need any help with any of that…” she lets the implication hang.

He nods and drops out of the window. 

She pushes away her worry.

~~~~~~

Gathering the information for Bucky has given Jessica a chance to get to know Natasha better. Natasha is wildly frightening in the way she can change herself to any given situation. She’s the greatest actor Jessica has ever seen. She’s watched Natasha talk cops out of giving her tickets, watched her use her body like a carefully crafted weapon to manipulate and to kill. Jessica is scared as hell of her, more so than any of her other super friends. 

And, because Natasha is fearless, she breaks into Jessica’s apartment in the morning and makes her Russian hangover food while humming along to the radio. The first time Natasha did this, Jessica walked into her kitchen to see to see Natasha in a pink apron, a joke gift from Trish, and walked right back out to go back to bed. But Natasha persists. She wakes Jessica up, dodging haphazard kicks all without spilling the coffee she’s carrying. 

Jessica can see why Bucky likes her so much.

~~~~~~

After the third morning Natasha wakes her for weird Russian hangover food, Jessica puts her foot down.  
“Natasha?” 

Natasha raises her eyebrows while stirring a soup called solyanka on the stove. It’s a horrifying concoction but Natasha’s flat stare if she doesn’t eat it is even worse.

“What the fuck are you doing here?”

Jessica doesn’t understand Natasha. She knows her, but that’s different from understanding. All attempts to do so have, as of yet, failed.

“Cooking you breakfast.” She says with her most charming smile. Jessica suspects it might even be a real one. 

“Sure, ok.” Jessica says. She knows she’s giving up too easy, but she’s too hungover for Natasha’s everything.

“Stop trying so hard to pretend that you’re unlikable.” Natasha says in a painfully mild but serious tone.

“Shut up. Can’t you ever just let me be a depressed bastard in peace?” 

“I could.” Natasha says mildly, expression enigmatic. 

“Next time we’re going to my hangover place.” Jessica tells her peaking into the pot with the solyanka with distaste.

~~~~~~

It actually happens. Natasha still wakes her with coffee and she still needs a few minutes to adjust to being awake and hungover but then they go out.

Natasha doesn’t need hangover cures. She doesn’t get hungover just like Bucky doesn’t. But, for some reason, she’s here with Jessica.

They go to Jessica’s favorite bodega. Not that Jessica will admit it’s her favorite. It’s just a good bodega in the area. The man behind the counter knows her. So well, in fact, that he knows better than to try and speak to her beyond nodding in acknowledgment. Jessica grabs her food, pays, and takes it upstairs without speaking a word. This isn’t a date, Natasha has probably been to a million bodegas. So, why does this feel so intimate, she wonders. 

They barely speak as they eat. Natasha watches the people coming in and out of the bodega carefully. A couple cops on their way to work, a mother trying to corral her children into sitting down, everyone seems to know each other. No one acknowledges Jessica. She’s also aware of Natasha watching her closely.

“What?” Jessica snapped eventually.

“You’re not so isolated a you pretend to be.” Natasha tells her expression soft.

Jessica gets up, tosses the rest of her food out and storms away.

~~~~~~

The drinking group ends up at Nico’s again. Things are strained. She’s uncomfortable with Natasha, Matt and Frank are walking on eggshells around each other, Bucky is stiff and quiet. She doesn’t know what to do.

“Hey, we should all get really drunk!” Clint says, entirely too cheerful, a few minutes into the evening.  
Bucky narrows his eyes at him.

“What?” Clint asks, feigning offence.

“No, let’s do it,” Matt breaks in, as Bucky makes a disgusted noise. Matt chugs his beer and calls over to Nico for a round of shots. Clint whoops with indominable cheerfulness. Jessica appreciates his manic cheerfulness. She recognizes the attempt to lubricate the awkwardness between them. 

Nico just drops a whole bottle of the most disgusting vodka in the bar in front of them and leaves them to their shots. Two shots in Matt calls for tequila much to Bucky’s disgust. After a few more shots no one but Bucky really cares in their drinking vodka or tequila anymore anyway.

Jessica holds out better than Clint and Matt who are quickly too drunk to walk properly but when she stands to go to the bathroom she almost falls over nothing. She looks at Bucky and says “I’m fucking drunk,”

He raises his eyebrows and nods at her. Clint seems to think this is the funniest thing in the world and tips his chair back laughing. While she’s standing there in shock he tips over, almost bringing Matt with him and cracks his head on the floor. He’s still laughing as she walks away to the bathroom.   
On her way back to the table, she stops at the bar to talk to Nico.

“Nico, Nico, I’m drunk,” she informs him.

“Yeah, I know.” He’s not impressed.

She grabs his arm, “I’m drunk.” She tells him more urgently.

“Do you need some help?” he asks, at a loss.

She shrugs and walks back to the table, trying her best not to knock into anything.

Clint has managed to knock Matt back onto the floor too and they’re both laying there on the floor, giggling together. 

She goes over to Bucky and grabs his shoulder. He jumps, hands clenching. She notes distantly that he’s tense, and there’s something bad about this.

She looks at him for a moment, at a loss for what she was going to say. After a moment she breaks the stare and moves to sit down.

When she’s properly seated she announces, “We should call someone,” and without further ado fumbles her phone out of her pocket. It seems to take inordinately long to find the name she wants.  
Finally, “Jessica?” Malcom’s voice comes through the line.

“Malcom. Malcom, I’m drunk.” She informs him. This feels important.

“Ok. Do you need me to pick you up? Did you fall off a roof again? Please, don’t be in the garbage again.” 

“No, I’m at Nico’s.” she tells him. She lets her head loll onto her shoulder and suddenly the phone is plucked away from her. She doesn’t fight for it. Instead, she sits staring at Clint, who is seated again and leaning over to talk to Frank, who doesn’t look like he’s listening. Clint is holding Matt’s hand under the table.

She just stares at their joined hands, noticing how stupefied and tired she feels. Her trance is broken when Bucky reaches into Matt’s pocket for his phone, and Matt swats ineffectually at him. She half listens to Bucky talking to someone on the phone. He mentions something about 2am and Jessica grabs her phone to see that yes, it is 2:30am. They’ve been drinking much longer than she thought. Next Bucky pulls out his own phone. Jessica is mystified.

The plot is revealed half an hour later. By then Matt has his head on the table and Clint is still in animated conversation with Frank, who looks like he’s not absorbing a single word. Bucky is by the counter talking to Nico in a quiet voice. Malcom walks into the bar.

“What are you doing here?” Jessica tried to sound indignant but she can hear herself miss the mark.

“I’m here to make sure you don’t die of alcohol poisoning on a street corner on you way home, Jessica.” He sounds tired and she remembers again that it is very early. 

“I don’t need you.” She shrugs off his attempt to help her stand, but he catches her as she stumbles. 

Natasha walks in as they’re walking out together. She walks up to Bucky and says, “You want me to be drunk tank guard tonight?” she doesn’t sound happy. Bucky doesn’t answer and Jessica is too drunk to understand what’s happening.

“Fine.” Natasha announces. It seems like only a moment later that Natasha is at the door dragging a drunken Clint behind her, “Hey, do you two need a ride?” 

Malcom stops them in the middle of the bar and Jessica doesn’t really follow what he’s saying. Instead, she enjoys the feeling on his chest vibrating at her side as he speaks. 

A few moments later, she finds herself in a car with Clint, Matt, Frank, and Malcom. Next, she remembers Malcom is tipping her into bed and onto her side. She thinks its sweet that he still thinks she can get sick from booze. 

The next morning Natasha is not there, but when she opens the fridge to grab a beer there’s a container of solyanka on the shelf with neatly written instructions on how to heat it and a little medicine cup on top with painkillers in it. Just as she’s about the wash the pills down with the beer, Malcom walks in and says, “No, you don’t.” and snatches the beer from her, pouring a glass of water before she can react properly.

“Fuck off.” She tells him after she swallows the pills. 

“Yeah, you’re welcome.” He sounds angry. She’s too hungover for this. 

“Whatever,” she says as she gets the soup out.

He sighs and walks out into her office. She comes out a few minutes later with properly heated soup and hands him a bowl. A peace offering. 

“What the fuck is this?” he asks her.

“Natasha made it.” 

“The redhead who drove us home?” 

“Oh, so she did have a soccer mom car that she drove us all home in?” Jessica could have sworn she made that up in her drunkenness.

“Oh yeah no, she came prepared to haul your drunk asses home.”

“How kind.” 

They eat in silence for a moment.

“Jessica, you should go to AA. NA helps me a lot.” He says eventually.

She doesn’t dignify that with an answer. She tries to put all of her thoughts on that idea into one look. 

“No, I’m serious. It could help you. Or get a therapist. I’m sure Trish knows someone. Just – you really scared me last night.” He tells her. She tries to ignore how genuinely concerned he sounds. 

“I’m fine.”

“You’re still drunk.” He accuses. 

“I usually am.” She answers.

“Jessica –” he doesn’t continue.

She closes her eyes and sighs. “Are you free this evening?” she asks eventually.

“Yeah, sure.” He answers easily. She’s genuinely not sure what his job is right now that has such weird hours and suddenly she’s shamed for not asking.

“Want to watch a movie? On my shitty laptop?” she asks. She remembers vaguely the feel of his body against her as he held her up last night and she craves that warm suddenly and intensely. 

“Sure, no beer and you’re bringing the popcorn though,” he tells her

~~~~~~

Bucky calls her.

“We’re going somewhere else tonight.” Is what he says instead of a greeting.

“What?” she’s not sure what he’s talking about.

“Nico is angry and I’m done with drunk people,” he then rattles off the address of a safe house. She wants to argue but she knows it useless too. 

~~~~~~

The face Bucky has picked for their meeting is above a cute bakery. Everyone brings coffee with them from the same bakery. Jessica is nervous. She’s sure she doesn’t know how to interact with them without alcohol to bolster her. She won’t admit it but she took a few swigs of whisky on the way over.

Clint, Bucky, and Matt are all engaged in some important sounding talk when she walks in. Frank is a corner talking to Sam of all people. Matt calls a hello to her and Sam waves when she walks in. Otherwise, she’s left to peruse the doughnuts, actual real doughnuts, until Sam walks over to her. 

“Hey, if you’re ever looking for someone, you can tell her anything.” And with that cryptic statement Sam hands her a card. She glances over it, sees the word therapist, and stuffs the card in her jacket pocket, alongside her flask. 

“Thank you,” she says and she’s not sure if she means it.

“Anytime,” his smile is toothy but soft. She can see what Bucky sees in the man in that moment.   
Bucky wanders over to the two of them in that moment and he bumps his shoulder ever so softly into Sam’s. Sam turns to him with a smile, a happy smile, at Bucky. Jessica has to look away. 

“What’s up, Bucky?” 

Bucky doesn’t acknowledge that Sam has spoken; he instead stares Jessica down. 

“I wanted to thank you for the files you gave me.” He says firmly.

“I don’t want to know how many assassinations my information lead to.” She blurts out. 

He grins and its only then that she notices how drawn and tired he looks. She doesn’t get to analyze further though because Clint bursts into everyone’s awareness by yelling “Matt, dude! You’re fucking amazing!” 

Matt cocks his head toward Clint and grins, and Jessica suddenly and vividly remembers them holding hands last time they all got together. 

“What? Because I brought doughnuts?” Matt asks.

“Exactly!” Clint answers through a mouthful of doughnut. Frank, standing beside Matt, cringes at Clint’s manners. 

Matt laughs brightly and Sam wanders over to him and Natasha is left with Bucky standing awkwardly by the doughnuts.

He turns to her with narrowed eyes and she knows she’ll hate the next word out of his mouth.

“Is it fun getting that drunk?” he asks. Yep, she hates this already.

“Sure,” she says but she knows that they both know its more complicated than that.

“It doesn’t look fun and its not like I can remember.” He says and his tone is a bit too flat.

“What do you know about fun, Bucky?” she snaps and the conversation in the room dies. She wants to take it back but she doesn’t know how. She walks out of the room and into the bathroom to hide. 

It takes a few minutes for conversation to reach the same level it had before. She wanders out again several minutes later but can’t bring herself to go back into the big room the rest were gathered in. She doesn’t want to leave either. 

She checks if she can go out to the fire escape. Sure enough, Bucky picked an apartment with a easily accessible fire escape. 

She sits out there and takes a few more swigs hoping Bucky will show up eventually. 

It’s almost an hour before someone comes to find her. It’s not Bucky though. It’s Sam.

He sits next to her. Too far away for them to touch. 

“Sorry.” She blurts. It’s been sitting at the tip of her tongue for too long and she couldn’t hold it anymore.

“I’m not the one who needs to hear that.” Sam says after a beat of silence. 

She cringes. 

“Is he still here?” she asks.

Sam nods, “We’re heading over Clint’s in a few hours but Bucky wants to stay here a recover a bit.” 

She gives Sam a grim smile and climbs back inside. 

She finds Bucky laying in a deceptively calm looking pose on couch. He’s texting someone. He sits up slowly as she come into the room, not meeting her eye.

“I overstepped and I apologize.” She says.

He looks at her finally.

“Jessica, I like you.” He says. She refuses to wince. 

“I worry about you.” 

That makes her more ashamed than she had been before.

“Everyone keeps fucking saying that.” She says again.

He shrugs.

“Because it’s true.” Sam says from behind her and she jumps.

“Who asked any of you?” she thinks in this moment that she would like to stop being so defensive but she doesn’t know how. 

“We’re your friends Jessica. I won’t apologize for caring for you.” Sam tells her. Bucky nods on the couch. She hates how much that sounds like a cruel joke.

“When are we meeting at Clint’s?” she asks eventually because she doesn’t know what to say to that.

“At 6:30. Jessica, do you want a hug?” Sam asks.

She stares at him for a long moment before answering “Sure,” as casually as she can. 

Bucky had said before that Sam gives amazing hugs and she had never really understood before. She only allows herself a few minutes to bask before she apologized again and then shows herself out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter deals a lot more with alcoholism than the other one. If that's something that upsets/triggers you please tread carefully.
> 
> [Come say hi to me on tumblr!](http://sometimesihavequestions.tumblr.com/)
> 
> Also, please leave comments and kudos, they give me life!

**Author's Note:**

> Kilgrave should be his own warning. There are so some references to Matt having experienced CSA. If anyone needs anything tagged please tell me.
> 
> Comments give me life!


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